[Mariam] My name's Mariam Nabatanzi
[Mariam] I'm 39 years old
[Mariam] God has blessed me with the ability to have twins
[Mariam] First, I had two,
then another two…
and two more
[Mariam] In my 4th pregnancy, I bore 4
[Mariam] After that, I began having triplets… and quadruplets
[Mariam] In total I gave birth 15 times
[Mariam] This is my last child
[Mariam] The only one born alone, without a twin
[Mariam] In total I gave birth to 44 kids
MAMA UGANDA
[GEO] UGANDA
[Mariam] My mother abandoned me… when I was only three days old
[Mariam] I lived with my dad. He looked after 6 of us kids
[Mariam] Dad found a new wife
[Mariam] After 3 months living with us, she smashed a bottle into tiny pieces…
and told us to eat the fragments
[Mariam] But I was very stubborn
[Mariam] I refused to eat them… and went outside to play
[Mariam] When I came back home, I found all my siblings dead
[MARIAM NABATANZI] Dad sent me to be… raised by my grandmother I lived with her
[Mariam] When I was 12, Grandma and Dad had a big argument
[Mariam] Father came and took me to marry me off
[Mariam] When I asked my grandmother,
she said…
a man had paid for me when I was born
[Mariam] At 13, I already had my own kids
[Margherita] And there’s a clear statistics also saying that Uganda is
one of the countries with the highest rate of child marriage in the world.
[Margherita] That just last year alone,
one million Ugandan experienced sexual violence.
[Margherita] Yeah? So, it is child marriage, it is teenage
pregnancy, and the parents encourage that to happen.
[MARGHERITA KELLO, PLAN INTERNATIONAL] And they don’t see any problem with it.
[Margherita] You’ll get to market and there are people bringing produce but they
also bring cows. So in northern Uganda in a district called Lira
in a lot of their markets they
actually bring cows from one parent
who is marrying,
and the cows transit through a market to the parent
who is giving away her daughter. So ordinarily you just see people busy
in the market as if people are really buying and selling, but
it has also become a vehicle where marriage transactions happen.
[Mariam] I was there when cows… and goats were brought But I didn't know it was my dowry
[Mariam] I know it was my dad who arranged my marriage
[Mariam] Since then, I've been disappointed in this world, and I've never been loved
[Mariam] Ever since that day
[Margherita] Every four women that you see in Uganda, every four
– one would have had a child before the age of 19.
[Margherita] But the girls really suffer a lot.
[Margherita] They find themselves pregnant. Yes! And they can’t even say,
“I’ve had my 2 children so that is enough for me”. No!...
[Mariam] I married an old man. I was just a kid then And he constantly humiliated me
[Mariam] There were moments when I couldn't stand it any longer, but
I had to stay married - I wanted to have kids only with 1 man
[Mariam] After I had three sets of twins,
I understood it was enough I went to the doctor
[Mariam] But the doctor told me…
[Mariam] I have so many eggs that I must continue giving birth
'If you don't you might get tumours, and you'd die in no time'
[Mariam] When I was on the pill I felt very sick,
so I stopped taking it
[Mariam] My husband started bringing home lovers, made me cook for them, clean up after them
[Mariam] And I put up with it
[Mariam] Then he sold everything and left, and I was left alone with the kids
[Mariam] My grandma invited me to live at her place
[Mariam] I lived with my husband for 21 years
[Mariam] Nothing good happened to me in my marriage, except my kids
[Mariam] You want to see where my kids sleep?
[Mariam] What if they sleep on the floor?
[Mariam] Through here
[Mariam] Not the best conditions
[Mariam] This is where the smallest kids sleep,
those who require special care
[Mariam] Two children… sleep in each bed,
a few of them sleep on the floor In total, 14 children sleep in this room
[Mariam] This is a boys' room, 7 of them sleep here That's a playroom,
and that's where… I feed them in the evening when it gets dark
[Mariam] This was supposed to be a living room,
but since I have…
no money,
I can't put armchairs in there So we have to sit on these plastic chairs
[Mariam] This is my kitchen where I cook for my children
[Mariam] But I need to fix up the house When it rains,
we get puddles inside
[Mariam] I need to pay tuition fees… so my kids can go to school
[Mariam] So they have a proper education, in a school
[Voice] You have to speak how? [Kids] Louder
[Voice] And then how about the sets?
[Kids] A set of boxes!
[Kids] A set of blackboards!
[Miriam] I was at school and a man came to me, gave me some money,
and we went to his place I was hungry, and I went with him
[Miriam] I didn't know his true intentions
[Miriam] I didn't know he was going to use me
[Miriam] I refused at first, but he said he'd take me by force
[Miriam] When I learnt that I was pregnant, I dropped out of school
[Miriam] I liked going to school, but after I had the baby, I decided not to return, but to take care of the baby
[Margherita] So you know very well that when they are giving birth, and many of them don’t even give birth in hospitals.
[Margherita] So you find a girl with a rupture – you know, with a fistula,
and fistula is one of those very painful ways to live,
because you keep living and your bladder can’t hold the urine. So as a young girl,
you know very well that no man would even want to marry you when you have fistula.
MIRIAM, 13 YEARS OLD
[Miriam] I want to have a good life
[Miriam] I want to be respected,
to be independent of men
[Margherita] You know, Uganda – just like any country – is a patriarchal country,
and the ideology is of male supremacy.
[Margherita] The man is the boss, the man is the
bread-winner, the man is the one who marries.
[Margherita] Now, we need to get to a country where a woman is valued in the same way that we value the men.
[Mariam] I never went to school
[Mariam] I haven't even been in a school building
[Mariam] My father didn't give me an education
[Mariam] 15 of my kids now go… to boarding school
[Mariam] It bothers me that the school is expensive
[Mariam] I talked to the teachers, and they let my kids study on credit
[Mariam] I was saving money, paid in instalments,
saved money again And while… I'm paying off the old debts, new ones accrue
[Mariam] I know all my kids must have an education - all of them
[Mariam] I have 16 girls, the rest are boys Saudais
[Mariam] This is Sharif and Maddy
[Mariam] And Nabutebi
[Mariam] Saudais, where's Vinny?
[Mariam] Yes, you come here too
[Mariam] Subuga, Balamaga Geeda is sick, she's at home now
[Mariam] Where's Nakagua?
[Mariam] I'm happy that my girls are getting an education,
because I was deprived of such an opportunity
[Mariam] Tell me, who was misbehaving in school? [Voice] Maddy
[Mariam] She's bothering and beating us She's bothering and beating you? Maddy looks innocent
[Mariam] I was told you bit people's ears?
[Mariam] You see this man and woman?
[Mariam] They want to take you to America Will you go?
[Voice] Yes! [Mariam] You'll leave me here alone?
[Voice] No, we won't go without you
[Mariam] For a second, I thought you'd leave with some strangers
[Mariam] As they say in Luganda,
'An elephant can't shed its tusks'
[Mariam] Though I'm illiterate,
I can still raise and educate my kids
[Mariam] Well, I'm trying to rely on practical wisdom… given to me by God
[Mariam] I look for money here and there I wash
other people's clothes… just to survive
[Mariam] Even though I'm a Muslim, I've learnt how to make moonshine,
I sell it and make a little bit of money
[Mariam] I gather herbs, process them, and sell them to
people I try to help them Cure diseases they have
[Mariam] It helps the infertile,
both women and men,
who want to have a baby But I didn't have to use it,
because I was blessed by God
[Mariam] That's my whole family, gathered all together All my beloved children are here
[Mariam] That's Grandma, who raised me And this is my mum who bore me
[Mariam] When I was married off, I didn't know my mother But after Grandma died,
life had become intolerable,
it was too hard for me Grandma was my rock,
and my dad never kept in touch
[Mariam] I wanted him to console me, but he kicked me out
[Mariam] I had no refuge in this world
[Mariam] I made it my mission to find my mother Good thing
[Mariam] I had her picture, which my father had given me
[Mariam] One day, I went to Busia to look for some local herbs
[Mariam] I met a local there
[Mariam] I was trying to get something out of my bag, and the picture fell out
[Mariam] He asked me: 'Why do you need this picture?
[Mariam] If that's your mother, I'll take you to her'
[Mariam] When we got there, my mum didn't recognise me
[Mariam] The man asked if she knew me She said she didn't
[Mariam] My mother asked the man to step outside,
and she told him that it was true,
that she had six children from her first marriage
[Mariam] Her new husband didn't know she had kids before,
so she asked the man to warn me not to call her 'mother'
[Mariam] She said to stay away from her She even said… if she hadn't been
looking for me, then I wasn't supposed to bother looking for her
[Mariam] That meeting didn't bring me the joy I'd been seeking
[Woman] Some people want to quit school… because they feel very tired
[Woman] And some are prompted to drop out… by their family situation and lack of money
[Woman] But you must take care of your life…
no matter what's going on around you
[Woman] The situation could make you sleep with some stranger,
but this person might just use you and throw you away later
[Woman] Poverty, poverty…
[Woman] Most girls get pregnant because of poverty
[Woman] We girls want it all,
delicious meals, a luxury life But if you have nothing,
accept what little God gave you
[FRANCIS EMBLICA, CHILD CARE AND YOUTH EMPOWERMENT FOUNDATION (CCAYEF)] So,
when we get those girls, we give them that activity, it’s a social package
to build their mind and deter them from diseases. And then later we let these girls join
vocational trainings, because we need these girls to be economically empowered, and
it’s through them being economically empowered that they will resist another man that will come their way
when they’re still young for sexual favours, that later can turn into HIV, can turn into teenage pregnancy.
[Francis] We are creating their mind to understand that, of course
they did something that was not proper, but it’s not their crime.
[Nakate] When I came here, they offered me to learn how to make braids or how to sew I chose braids
[Nakate] I dropped out before I finished seventh grade because I got pregnant
[Nakate] I was waiting tables in a hotel,
and the guy worked in a mobile phone kiosk nearby
[Nakate] We fell in love
[Nakate] He told me that if we had sex once, I couldn't get pregnant. But I did.
[NAKATE, 17 YEARS OLD] And he told his mother about it His mother said that waitresses sleep around with everybody
'There's no evidence that the baby is yours She can look for some other family because you're not the father'
[Woman] What do we strive for? [Voice] My life, my choice
[Woman] My life, my what? [Voice] Choice
[Mariam] How much for these two hands of matooke? [Voice] This one's 15,000, this one's 10,000 shillings
[Mariam] How much is cassava? 2,000 shillings? Is it any good? [Voice] Yes, it is
[Mariam] I can try to save 50,000 shillings, and it takes me a month
to do it so I can buy something nice like this for my kids
[Mariam] They'll eat it in one sitting and still be hungry
[Mariam] Only those who eat rice
[Mariam] Those who want matooke stand to the right
[Mariam] But you must eat the whole thing
[Mariam] You want only rice with no matooke?
[Mariam] First, I need those who want rice
[Mariam] Some more, Maddy?
[Margherita] Before you see we get more people now on our side, also
empathise with younger girls getting married very early, to the earlier times
when it was business as usual. Now you have to marry young girl
very consciously because, you know, the law is also following.
[MARGHERITA KELLO, PLAN INTERNATIONAL] And in 2017 the government of Uganda also launched a
national strategy on ending child marriage and teenage pregnancy. So the situation was worse – eh? 3
– 4 years before it was very bad. But now it is moving. And now young girls themselves are
empowered, they are beginning to be at the forefront, they are beginning to demand for their rights.
[Voice] Have you ever thought about giving away your older daughters to marry someone?
[Mariam] Now I want to pick up a stick from the ground, and chase you away from my house,
when you ask me about giving away my children
[Mariam] I only want my kids to study
[Mariam] After they get an education, if they decide to get married,
[Mariam] I won't be talking them out of it
[Mariam] Everyone dreams of a good life, of a perfect family
[Mariam] But it all requires a lot of hard work
[Mariam] So I don't think I'll ever live in a good house, or anything like that,
because I have too many responsibilities
[Mariam] But I hope, one day,
my children will build a better house than the one I have now
[Mariam] I lay all my hopes on the kids
[Mariam] What matters is that I pay their tuition fees, that they're alive and well,
that they don't starve
[Mariam] And the rest is a mere trifle